Wednesday, February 28, 2018

Selective Reading

Sarah and I had a conversation on the way home from school today. I always find these so entertaining and enlightening.

We've had a lot of rain in the last few weeks. Last weekend our street was flooded and, while we are above the flood zone, our neighbors are not. We didn't have to leave the house but several of them had to move their cars to higher ground. 

Today we had misting rain and Sarah noted that, like me, she loves rain. However, she said that she wasn't happy with the flooding issues. 

She commented, "I thought God said he wouldn't flood anything anymore?"

I said, "That's not exactly what he said."

"In the Bible it says he wouldn't make it flood anymore," she said.

"No, he said that he wouldn't destroy the world by flood anymore," I said.

"Oh." 

I added, "The next time he'll do it by fire."

"What?"

"The Bible says that the next time God will destroy the world by fire."

Long pause and then she said in a strained voice, "And that's why I don't read some chapters in the Bible."

Hmmm.

Saturday, February 24, 2018

In The Rain

Pixabay.com


I wanted to see you,
needed to see you.
The rain reminded me 
of how much I missed you,
but my pain was lost
in the rain.
Then darkness fell,
and hid the world.
And it left me staring
at my own reflection
in a rain-washed glass
but my tears were lost
in the rain.


Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Resurrection D

As anyone who had read the blog in the last six weeks will know, I've been sick. A cold laid me flat and after I began to get over it, I was slammed by the worst fatigue I have had in, well, I can't remember.

Take note, please, although I've experienced some mild fatigue for the last two days I have not taken more than an hour nap and that was yesterday. I've been able to wash clothes and put away laundry, wash dishes, and I have a roast in the cooker for dinner. Yeah, I know!

Alas, no writing yet but I feel that by the end of the week I'll be able to get back into the novels. I think I'm learning patience. UGH! Whatever, I'm thankful to be almost free of that deadly exhaustion.

I do not say deadly lightly. I really was getting worried by this past Sunday. The cold was cleared up but I've been sleeping an average of 12 hrs a day. Usually 6-8 at night and then having to sleep anywhere from 4-6 hours in the daytime. It wasn't voluntary either. I had to lie down or I'd fall down and I fell asleep nearly instantly every time. I had people calling to see if I was all right because they knew something was wrong with me. So, this wasn't me being dramatic.

The good news is I think I found the cause. About a month ago, when I became so sick with the cold, I had run out of my vitamin D. I kept trying to remember to go get more but I either was too sick to go get it, couldn't remember to ask someone, or when I was out, didn't remember myself. So, I've been without vitamin D3 for about 6 weeks.

On Sunday I got depressed and desperate. I basically prayed and ask God to help me find out what was causing this problem. Because I absolutely knew it was abnormal. That evening, as I was taking my pills, something just told me to go to the store and get the vitamin D. I didn't waste time. I left in the middle of things, got it, and came back. I took 15,000 units Sunday night. Monday morning I took 15,000 unit. Yes, yes, yes, I know that is a lot. Trust me, I've been doing this a long time, over 10 years, in fact. I've been taking 10,000 units, over doctor protest, that long. I get regular bloodwork, at MY request, to monitor my blood levels of D. I have never been over 100 and toxic is 170.

Here's the thing. Several meds I take for RA actually prevent the absorption of D. In other words, any D I get, whether via sunshine, foods, or pills are blocked by those meds. When they first discovered that I had a deficiency, I had recently been diagnosed with RA and fibro. I was at a blood level of 25. The started me on 1000 units. No impact. They raised me to 2000 units. No impact. They raised me to 5000 units and got my blood up to 30.  I took that for a very long time. Until I changed doctors.

In the meantime, I did research, lots and lots of research. I read books on D and the medical studies on it and the relationship to autoimmune diseases. So, I know what I'm talking about. I had a hip problem and it developed into a leg problem and I could not walk some days without out a cane. I was in my 50's! My research revealed a connection to bone and muscle pain and D deficiency. I asked my new doc it I could take 10,000 units. She said yes. Hip and leg pain disappeared. No cane needed, thank you.

Now, back to today. As of today, the brain fog is slowly passing. Muscle pain and joint pain has decreased substantially. Remember the pain from the weekend? Go read the blog or Facebook. That pain is nearly gone. The damaged nerve in my hand is always in pain. For weeks it has been worse than when I ruptured the disk and nearly unbearable. Today... minimal pain that is bearable. I've even gone without the hand cover I wear constantly. But the major impact is that I'm not falling down with exhaustion and passing out as soon as I sit down.

For close to 5 years my doctors kept wanting me to reduce my D intake. I've refused, citing my bloodwork and the pills that are affecting absorption. Two years ago my RA doc finally conceded that I "tolerate high doses of D very well" and suggested I keep taking it. (smirk) Certainly. I never had any intention of doing differently.

I'm anxious to write now. I mean right NOW. I can actually feel my brain beginning to kick into gear. It is always astonishing. I can't believe I went 6 weeks and never made the connection. Of course, in that condition, you aren't thinking. Because I KNEW you see. I should have caught it earlier but I guess because I was so sick with the cold and not functioning well anyway that it just got by me. Please, if you hear me talking about that fatigue again, remind me!

And if you struggle with autoimmune diseases, chronic fatigue, or fibromyalgia please demand they check your D levels. If they're below 50 I'm telling you, you need more D. Do your research. Search Google Scholar because they have medical documentation of research and trials. Be very specific. For example, I research Vitamin D and medications that prevent absorption, Vitamin D and RA, D and Fibromyalgia, D and chronic fatigue. Research your disorder and Vitamin D. I think you'll be shocked. Also, you might look for a book called, The Miraculous Result of Extremely High Doses of Vitamin D This is not an endorsement of his use of extremely high doses of D. I DO NOT SUGGEST that you take high doses of D without blood work and monitoring but the data in this book is what you need. In an earlier version, he gives hundreds of links to clinical trials and articles on this topic. You don't have to have to book to research it yourself. It was just one of the triggers that got me started.

Now I will leave you. I have a school meeting that I will be able to stay awake for and then I have to get back home and with luck, I'll have my evening free to relax. We'll see how tomorrow goes. I'll be taking the 15,000 units at least thru the end of the week.  I think that the weekend might just be awesome. I don't think it will be as bad as the last one.


Saturday, February 17, 2018

Saturday Author Focus #3

I was recently pointed to a sample copy of Sarah Scutt's short story, Vera's Ring. This review, because it was a samply only, is by necessity short. However, I think I can say that the story begins well and you immediately know you're reading a haunted house story. I love haunted house stories so I'm looking forward to getting the full short story.

Vera is a thrift store owner living in her family home. This is no ordinary house, by the way. The doors, drawers, and various items are moving around. Vera doesn't appear to notice. . . unless they break something.

I can't say if the whole story will keep me reading but the opening chapter certainly peaked my curiosity and I'd like to know what's up. I'll post when that happens.

Ms Scutt writes well but there were two errors that her editor missed in this sample chapter. Since it is a short story, it can easily be fixed. I always mention when I find errors. If it were me, I'd want to fix it. They don't detrace from the writing but unfortunately, I'm that reviewer sees the small things.

I'd encourage you to pick this story up if you're into haunted houses. No pun intended.

You can find the story here: Vera's Ring on Amazon.
You can find Ms. Scutt on Facebook here: Sarah Scutt
And her blog is here: Sarah Scutt Writes

Tuesday, February 6, 2018

Terror in my Mind

Courtesy Pixabay.com
It is raining but that's better than snow. It is still cold. I'm slightly better but I'm fighting fatigue like it was some giant troll from The Hobbit. I'm coughing less but no less choking. Either the crud in my chest is gone or I'm starting over.

I did attempt a little bit of writing one day over the weekend but I couldn't tell you which one. A few times I sat down to write but was so tired I couldn't sit up. This morning, after going to bed at 8:30 last night and getting up at 6 a.m., I still had to lie down at 8 a.m. and sleep for 2 hrs. After which, I was still tired and couldn't even put away that last load of laundry.

It is depressing. I recognize the symptoms. I've been sick a month and after the year I had last year, it is so discouraging to not be able to do anything worthwhile. I have a story that is 5000 words short of a completed first draft. Oh, a piece of cake, you think? Only if your brain works and you can stay awake. Before all this, I could have done that in 2 hours. Really.

I would really be curious to hear from other writers with auto-immune disorders that are impacting their life in this way. I retired in 2013 and thought that less stress would help. It hasn't. In fact, I've gotten worse. Most days I feel totally out of control of my own life. When I read over what I've written, I can see that it is really good, very good. And it makes me a sick to think I'll never get it finished.

Oh wow. This wasn't meant to be a pity party. I'm sorry. I was going to write about something else entirely. It is 8:40 p.m. here and I'm about to head off to bed. Despite about 12 hrs sleep in the last 24, I'm tired. I keep thinking this will pass soon. Time is relative.

In a few weeks, I'll see my doctors again and discuss this with them. I do think one problem is that I've lost a lot of physical strength since I blew the disk in my back. I have no stamina and I need to get out and do some physical activity to rebuild that. But it is harder the older you get. Once, I'd have just started an aerobics routine and built up in a few weeks to an hour workout. The thought exhausts me now.

I hope your writing is progressing and if you're struggling with physical problems that interfere with your writing, just keep going. Don't give up or lose heart.  You'll feel worse if you stop. I've been entertaining that thought for weeks now. I'll just give up. No more writing. No more stories. No listening to the voice whisper adventures in the night. Just stop.

That is the most terrifying thought I've ever experienced.

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