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Wednesday, September 26, 2018

The Hunt for Motivation

Should I really write about writing? Or should I write about not writing? Because that's really how it has been going. Between a major flare, totaling my car, homework, major fatigue, and trying to get some of the projects I've begun finished I have not written a thing. I've been doing some reading as time allows.

Honestly, I've had to sleep nearly 2 hours during the day every day to stay mobile. The fatigue is just killing me slowly. For two weeks I seemed to be turning a corner. That is funnier than you know. On Friday the 21st, I got rear-ended in the parking lot of Rural King when someone else turned a corner and slammed into my car.  I was half out of my parking space when a Silverado hit me in the rear. He said he didn't see me. I think he probably didn't and with his arm in a sling, he probably couldn't handle that truck very well.

So, since the 21st, I've been sitting worrying about what I'm going to do. Can't afford a car payment now and no savings to buy a car. The cherry on the top is that my car is apparently only worth $3700. Wow. There was nothing wrong with it and if the bozo had paid attention, I'd have a car I know runs well and actually looked fine.

Did I mention that I get really angry when I think about this? I hate car shopping. My late husband always did that. He'd bring one home for me to drive and if we both liked it, we'd buy it. I'm not wired for this. And don't dare say anything to me about independence, power, and all that crap. On my home planet, I was a queen. Oh, how the mighty have fallen. I'd give anything for the King to return. Or just let me go home again.

For now, I'm going to bed. I have no more desire to do another thing and I'm feeling a bit sick. Tomorrow, I begin again to look for an affordable vehicle. I believe there is a good car out there waiting for me. The search is just so overwhelming. I'm just having trouble making myself move.





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